What is love?
If somebody knows, please tell me. If you even have the faintest idea about what this is all about then I beg you to tell me.
What is it? Think about it for a while here.
I can tell you all the text book answers to it, but the question is, which one is true?
How can some people fall in love with different people so many times? How can some people fall in love with different people at the same time? And these aren't fake love as long as those people are concerned. I mean sure there are people out there who just say "Yes I love.." without actually thinking about it but there are also people who think about it and realise they're (were) in love with more than one person.
If yes, then how come such a thing is possible as this totally contradicts the theory of a soul mate. Isn't there supposed to be that one person out there who's supposed to be meant (made) for you? Or maybe there are soul mates. There are more than one?
Is that why some people fall in love more than once?
But what if there really is just one soul mate out there but he lives in Iraq and you live on Mount Everest? Is there like destiny and at one point in life you will definitely meet the soul mate regardless? However what if the your supposed soul mate doesn't believe in soul mates and when the time came he just took the best option available and hence when destiny really does come to play he won't be available anymore. I mean people who believe in destiny and soul mates have to believe in morality and know that cheating is not right. And you say so leave the non-soul mate and go with the soul mate?
But what if you can really love more than one person at the same time and you really love your wife so you can't leave her for the soul mate even if god himself came down and told you "That woman you just meant in the bar is the woman i created just for you. I'm sorry I couldn't bring the two of you to meet sooner but oh well.."
If any or all of what I just said is true, then what is love? If none of it is.... then does love even exist?
Is there even such a thing as a soul mate? Maybe it's just something someone made up to get the girl of his dreams to go all lovey dovey and say "I do" to him.
Maybe the so-called "soul mates" out there who last forever until they die till eternity bla bla bla aren't really soul mates, they just happen to be two people who met, felt the attraction, married had kids and worked through all the fights and quarrels and hurts and hates and one day died. Maybe they were supposed to break up / divorce but they died too early and hence that appointed date of separation never came to materialise?
If you have to work through all of it, is that really love? I mean that's a part of a relationship I get it but is that really love?
Scientifically speaking love is as simple as it gets : lust, attraction, attachment. It doesn't last forever and you can have as many as your heart desires. You meet someone you define as hot / pretty/ beautiful / phat /sexy and lust appears. You act on that lust and talk / date / have sex and get to know that person beyond physical matters and attraction comes to play. After spending intimate moments with that person you find yourself used to the idea of him / her and hence attachment begins. Biologically and evolutionarily speaking we have to mate and reproduce to ensure our existence on this planet so the attachment is the part where you have sex make babies and make it through until the infant can survive. After the baby is born all biology and evolutionary needs end (unless you want to make more with the same person) and you can either leave or raise it.
Lust last for maybe months. Attraction last for a few years... some say up to three. So the attachment part is the part we're all interested in. Attachment is the bonding which promotes relationships that last for many years, and even decades. Attachment is generally based on commitments such as marriage and children, or on mutual friendship based on things like shared interests.
But before marriage existed and people were told you have to raise your children responsibly so they won't turn up to be serial killers or Hitlers, what was there?
There was lust and attraction and chemicals in your brain that we know define as "love".
If science is correct then there's no such thing as soul mates, right? But then I believe in science with as much heart as a person can give it but some times, just some times, I start thinking.
I think about the times when I felt a pain so terrible I really thought "Oh my god, my heart is breaking". But scientifically, a heart can't actually break. Not unless you freeze it and smash it with a sledge hammer, no. It's an internal organ that pumps to distribute oxygenated and deoxygenated blood in your body. How can a piece of muscle tissue BREAK from emotions? But it just really feels like it's breaking, you know?
And what if, just what if, all those people out there who are in love.... Maybe they aren't?
Maybe they saw someone and the idea of love hit them at that time and so somehow they subconsciously talked themselves into love with the other person, but it isn't love at all. It's just self-hypnotisms. Right?
In an article from Wiki, it says love can't be universally explained because our thoughts exist in so many different languages that affects our beings and hence you can't but a definite definition to such an abstract thing. Some say it's easier to experience than to explain.
But if no one can explain what love is to you, how would you know that particular emotion you're feeling is love and not something else?
Some say love isn't a feeling, it is an activity. But how can any romanticist actually believe that?
In the end, we're left with that one question we started with. What is love?
3 comments:
hhmm.. well i read this from an email some time ago. it says every1 has more than 1 soul mate in their life. it juz depends on timing. when do u meet wic. like juz coz married man has a girlfren outside, u can't say they aren't in luv. dat 3rd person mite be his soul mate too. but he met his wife 1st. wic mite be his other soul mate. so it all depends on timing. in my opinion,i dun believe in loving 2 person at 1 time. it oni happens when u lose feelings 4 da other person. either dat or u think u luv da other person but it's actually juz mere wavering. once u've sorted out that attraction, wic mite be coz it's sth fresh after being with some1 4 too long, u'll find urself wanting back da old partner.
i dun think u can say ppl who eventually break up never loved one another. love will wane when both party dun put in effort 2 make the relationship stay fresh. like those old couples who says aiya he oredi noes how i look without make up n thus gets lazy n dun put make up on. then when da husband goes out n c pretty gals with make up n falls 4 her, u can't reli blame him completely. as much as it means he wasn't faithful, da wife din put in effort 2 look pretty n surprise him once in a while rite?
i suppose love is when u're attracted 2 1 person more than any1 else in da world, probably finding urself missing dat person more than any1 else, longing 4 dat person's companion. dun wanna share dat person with other ppl. i noe this sounds reli cliched but probably dat's wad it is. at least i think it's somewhere along this line.
of coz there's da frenship kind, family kind bla bla. like how much i luv my eggie. XD
i tot many ppl will respond 2 this post! apparently not. hhmm.. y?? coz ppl can't figure out wad's love also?
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