Football : The Craze

OK, so basically, I'm just a typical, average teenager from Malaysia and everything is fine and dandy until we reach a certain point in my personal life: Football.
I hate it. I despise it. I loath it. I'm a gret fan of basketball, and any fool can make out that the complete opposite of basketball would be football. Here in Malaysia, basketball is a pretty Chinese dominated sports which would mean less support from the government and I think that because people are so crazy about football, they're actually overlooking basketball. My reason for hating this sports pretty much sucks, I know. In fact, I actually like playing it. I was a part of my school's handball team which is like football and basketball plused into one game and it gave me many chances to play football and it was pretty fun. Except when it comes to cheering my school team on because they totally suck (no offence) and most of the time I'm just watching 20 men chase after a single ball aimlessly, including the part where they have to aim the ball towards the goal. Funny cause even a non-player like me knows that you're supposed to shoot the ball within the boundaries of the 3 metal bars but 90% of the time I'm just seeing the ball go way up or way wide. On a side note, these men would be great for American football because there, you're required to kick the ball ABOVE the bar.
Wait, what I was talking about just now... Oh, the football craze. Yes.
You see, despite all my previous statements about how worthless football is, I find myself actually eager to watch those matches and I make sure I catch all the matches at 11p.m. I couldn't really be bothered to stay up till 3a.m. but my point here is, I'm watching football. I'm getting into the craze against my better judgement.
I even prepare snacks and beverages to consume during the 90+ minutes it would take to finish the match and spend most of that time period going, "*toot* Even my 3-legged outer-space grandma could kick better than you!". Before this craze actually started, I was telling myself I wouldn't get pulled into this tornado and thought it was stupid to sit in front of a grey box for more than an hour just to watch a helpless white ball being kicked around the field. Now that it has, I'm looking forward to tomorrow's match.
OK, I've been trying to think how so many people could actually learn to love one game so desperately and have came to several conclusions. You guys might think I'm just wasting my time but seriously, any game that could kill a man or make a billion people stay up all night anticipating it or get so many citizens of different hues and stripes to momentarily forget all about the suffering and pain going on around them and just be there for this moment when the game is played is simply... Amazing. If we could turn what makes football so successful into a business plan, you might be reading the blog of a future Donald Trump (not the ugly hairstyle part!) in the making.
Anyway, reason number one why football is so celebrated. It's cheap. No, I'm not talking about the RM700 Nike boots I saw the other day. I'm talking about the cost of conducting a simple game. Name me any other sport which can be played with just 3 things: space, ball (or anything that resembles a ball of any type), 4 objects. Space is for where the game will be conducted, "ball" is what they will be kicking and the 4 objects can vary from street lamps to the flip-flops you're wearing which will be used to signify the goal posts. That's it, that's all you need. Every other game needs something else. Basketball needs a hoop, American football needs too many things to list out, table tennis needs a paddle and a table. In short, no other game is as simple as this.
Reason number two: Any other game that can be played with less than or the same amounts of equipments as football cannot be played by a crowd. For example, running. It can be achieved with nothing involved yet it isn't a team sports which mean less chances of communication which leads to less interests in it. As for football, the player number can range any where from 2 to maybe 13 or 14 on each side. I mean, if the players are actually using the filed, 2 or 3 extra players wouldn't make a difference.
Reason number three: The ball is easy to find. Back in high school, the guys used to roll up paper and tie them up with a cellotape and that would become a ball. As for the more fortunate classes where the blackboard duster is still around, that would become the ball. My mom said young monks in the Burmese monasteries would roll up their robes and tie it with a string and kick it around for sports. People can kick tin cans as a ball too. So basically, it can happen with anything.
Reason number four: Because of the reason I've mentioned above, football has become a very popular sports among the active citizens of the world. As a result, these people spread this interest to other (I did say they're active, right?) and it just keeps on spreading. I mean look at people like Mel and Yimay! They would probably melt away if you place them 5 minutes under direct sunlight yet they're watching football and have their own team to support. In other words, at first it starts off as just an interest. Then these people spread the interest which is easy because of the reasons I stated and sooner or later, it becomes like this code of sorts where if a guy doesn't like football although he doesn't have any other sports to get seriously involved in, he ain't a man or something. Some people would actually take it as an insult if you ask them, "Hei, have you been watching the World Cup these days?". And yes, I'm speaking from experience. So this sport becomes sort of like and disease that spreads faster than flu, infecting everybody that isn't cut off from the world. As for the football fanatics, when you have so many people interested in a game, you're bound to find fanatics. I mean, it's all about statistics. If you point at a random person walking down a busy and bustling New York street, one time or the other you're bound to point at an Asian person, right?
So, there you have it. I'm actually ashamed to admit it but seems like I've got the football fever too. I'm actually planning on going to buy the German jersey as a show of support.