Monday, August 28

Nothing. Absolutely Nothing At All.

Gosh I'm bored..
Due to my current insufficient credit circumstances on my phone, I find that my life has been reduced to nothingness. Also, in light of my recent.... um... Charitable manner in which I lost 70% of my hair in aid of breast-cancer or AIDS awareness* (whichever I said in the previous post), I would prefer to not be seen outside the security of the 4 walls of my house which means I can't go out to enjoy my holiday with my dear friends. So here I am, blogging about absolutely nothing at all.
It's amazing isn't it, how something can be made out of nothing. It's completely against the rules of alchemy. It kinda reminds me of how a language is first formed. Just think, a pompous caveman woke up one day and decided "Hei, let's call hunting 'Ogooga'." or something like that.
But then how would he even know the word hunting should be call 'ogooga' because there wasn't even such a word called 'hunting' back then. But of course that's just a small insignificant point as opposed to the next mystery-- How in freaking cave-people's name did he get others to conform with him and call hunting 'ogooga' as well? Don't tell me he went up to another caveman, knock on his chest Tarzan style and shouted "Ogooga! Ogooga!" and the other caveman just understood him. What if the other caveman already had his own term for hunting? Will they fight it out on a battle to dominate the word 'hunting'? Are they dumb enough to cause bloodshed over something as stupid as the word 'ogooga'?
Or maybe people back then were psychic. Nothing needs to be said, just one look of the eye and they knew exactly what the other was thinking. Like let's say caveman wants to get some with cavewoman, all he had to do is pull his sabertooth skin (or leaves, whichever apparel they prefered wearing at that season) off and the cavewoman would understand. OK, now that was stupid. Of course everyone knows if you pull your shirt off in the presence of the opposite sex you're probably looking for sex or something, right?
This also brings into question the next point. Did those cave-people have the decency to have sex in private or did they just shag anywhere they wanted to. Wouldn't that be really bad because let's say couple A decided to do get some action in the middle of a cave-warming party (Assuming those cave-people were as party loving as we are...). So the rest of the cavemen would watch that free porn, get horny and want to have some action of their own too which would trigger a massive sex-fest, right? Talk about abstaining from orgies that might lead to STDs.
Returning to where we were just now. So we covered the process of naming a certain activity which is actually easy. How about naming a thing? The process gets a hell lot more complicated now. So, the previous smart-ass who named hunting 'ogooga' decides every other thing should have a name too. So he takes a look around and spots the heavy stone he uses to ogooga and thinks "I think we should call this 'ululu'." and hence, that ogooga equipment was named ululu. Now he has to spread the word ululu to his fellow cave-people. So he takes his ululu and brings it to the previous dumb-ass who gave in and followed the name ogooga without giving a fight to spread the word. He points at his ululu and says "Ululu!". The dumb caveman looks at the stone and thinks "Oh, so he named his stone 'Ululu'" and thought it was a specific name and decides to name his ogooga equipment 'Booga-wooga'.
So dumb caveman points to his stone and shouts "Booga-wooga!" enthusiastically and smart caveman thought this guy was trying to contest him and another blood spilling fight ensues. After a few broken bones, they still haven't realized the mis-tranfering of information. Dumb caveman has no idea why he is being clobbered and smart caveman has no idea dumb caveman doesn't get him. As the fight get's more heated, they deployed the use of their Ululu and Booga-wooga and in the end, both of them ended up dead.
Which means that the words 'ogooga' and 'ululu' no longer exists.
I mean it's stupid isn't it? If this really took place we would end up not existing at all because all of those smart caveman who wanted to name their stuffs battled it out to death. Or maybe nobody else decided to name their stuffs so nobody fought each other and we would end up with no language at all today.

Updated: Statement(s) marks with a * might not (most probably) be true.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

as i read thru ur blog i suddenly developed a sense of sympathy 4 u. u muz be reli bored at home huh??? coz things u blog abt can be ya.. very interesting i admit.. but then again.. very.. i dunno.. out. maybe out is da word. it's like something nobody gives a damn abt n u can blog bout it with so much interest. hahahhahahaha.. but then again.. u do hv bored readers like me who wud occasionally enjoy an interesting blog.. so juz keep on blogging bout more lame issues. hahahahahha..

-slur-

Niyi said...

ai~ its such a waste that a talented mind (referring to myself) is being wasted blogging about lame stuffs when i cuold be out there blogging bout cooler stuffs like the design of toilet seats and the car fronts.
oh, that jz gave me new ideas...

Anonymous said...

nawwww!!!!! lame+lamer=niyi

wahahahahaha.. but then again.. go blog bout them if u can make them sound interesting.. i hate holz.. they're making me die of boredom.. so bored till i can't get myself 2 study!! at least bz college days will spur me 2 study.. now i feel like lazy earthworm.

Anonymous said...

dont worry./.just blog.i'll be ur number one fan.ekke..i so wanna see ur new hairstyle!!
-shu-

Niyi said...

u mean u soooo wana laugh at my new hairstyle?